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Your Buddy System
One of the most difficult situations is starting on a brand new road to
success and not having a support network to talk to, or to help you through
those difficult or challenging times. No matter how intelligent, strong willed,
or determined you are there will be ocassions when you need a true friend
to give you a push, to give you an honest opinion, or to help you identify
ways to overcome an obstacle.
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To identify a person, or persons, that can give you what you need
does not mean people who you now count as friends or even current family
members. It may be that your current circles of friends do not have the
background you need in the area that you are now involved in because
their background or experience is too far removed.
So, what do your want your 'buddy' to have, to be?
First and foremost is to find or identify someone who believes in you.
Again, this may not necessarily be your spouse, or other family member,
or even your closest friend. It needs to be someone who sees you beyond
where you are today, someone who will push or encourage you to be more
than you are without stumbling over emotional issues that may arise. A
spouse or family member may not be able to separate their love and
support because they don't want to see your hurt, or they have their
own doubts about your intentions.
You want a person who is detached from your daily life, as it now
exists so they can clearly give you perspective without being entangled in
everyday issues like finances, or babies, or child rearing issues. This clear
perspective allows them to be totally detached from normal routines and
therefore able to keep you focused or offer advice and opinions that is in
no way intertwined with daily issues.
You also need a person who is great or capable of problem solving
because no matter what, there will be issues arise on your own to a
new career, business, or life. In other words, you need a person to
be solution oriented not problem oriented. This person plays a significant
role in playing the devils advocate, in offering opinions or solutions that
you may not be able to see because you are too close to the issue at hand.
And, finally, your best buddy will have their own network of friends,
acquaintances, or career or business associated that they can turn to in
case neither of you can determine a solution or alternative course of action.
The main point to all of this is that you don't or shouldn't go it
alone. When you are looking for a 'buddy' to help you along the way, sit
down and see if those you have in mind meet all of these points or attributes.
If they do not, determine who else and keep looking until you find the right
person.
This is a crucial part of reaching a goal so don't ignore it before you start
because you don't want to wait until you reach an impasse or obstacle; you
will only add to your frustration if you do.
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